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12 November, 2004 :: 5:57 p.m.

First snow of the winter and it didn't really amount to much, but it appears winter is actually here now. I didn't really have an opportunity to enjoy much of fall which sucks...

The annual deepening of my depression was late setting in, so I didn't even take any long walks to enjoy the cool weather and get lost in my head.

I have basically done a whole lot of nothing this semester...skipping classes, handing in all my work late, not really talking to anybody with the exceptions of Pat and Lacey, avoiding the computer because I should be doing homework, avoiding the computer because I can't think of anything to say to people I owe emails to, hating the idea that I still have a couple more of these semesters ahead of me and yet knowing it won't get any better once I'm out of school except I'll have the option to get the fuck away from here...

I have nothing interesting to say..........................shocking!

I should be sleeping right now. I think I'll go read The Castle until I fall asleep so that I can wake up pissy in a little over an hour to get ready for work.

Why don't I find my way here when there are actually things on my mind lately?

My mom won't know anything further until Monday...she went to the specialist, he looked at the images from her two CT scans and said it was unclear whether the growth was in her lung or on her spine--awesome! So she had to go Wednesday for more scans and we'll see...

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